One more thing i learned thanks to couchsurfing was to feel good about giving and receiving.
As i mentioned in a previous post, most people i know are on couchsurfing, so are most of my best friends.
It didn't happen from one day to the other, took many years and this is how it started:
Before i joined CS, i always felt ashamed of receiving without giving something in exchange, and i thought the pay it forward concept was not realistic in the materialistic society i was living in.
But while living in germany i had the chance to learn how to give, by hosting so many couchsurfers at my place, I wasn't getting anything in exchange, and that's what made me feel good.
When I had to work to get money it felt wrong, like when I used money to buy stuff, I killed the intimacy and the connection between people. If you have money to
pay rent, to buy food and buy stuff, you don't really need anybody or at least that's how I felt sometimes, because I could just buy anything and had no need for people's gifts.
But now I know I need the gifts, not because I'm poor but because they make me happy.
One year after that when i started traveling and staying at people's places i learned how to receive, and yes, at the beginning it felt awkward that they let me stay for free and decided to spend their time with me.
But then i thought, that i also let many people stay with me before and will keep doing it in the future, and i thought how good i felt for doing so.
I understood, that being a guest was also a way to make the host happy.
Because it feels good to give, so in turn i learned to feel good when receiving also, not because i was getting something for free, but because i was giving someone the chance to feel good and do something nice for me.
Now it's not awkward anymore and the more i receive, the better i feel, and the more i want to give also.
If I have the chance to pick up the tab I can *finally!* feel happy about it and if I have the chance of helping someone I can do it without giving a rat's ass about what they could do for me or how could they pay me back.
It also helped me feel at home wherever I am. That way you will never feel homesick because you are at home already.
I realized that this is home, right here, this is real and this is the place to be.
There's nowhere else than here and now, gotta enjoy it, or at least try to, which is already a lot!
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