thoughts on general life advice that was given to me at an earlier time and place

but you know actually, i agree with gustavo that everyone should work at some farm for at least a month every year so that later, when they come back to the city they don't take for granted the food they eat every day

and my granfather also was right about something. He always told me I should learn a trade, like carpentry, plumber or something so that I can always find work in any country, he said i should eat lots of fruits and should learn how to play an instrument, unfortunately i only listened about the fruits.

uncle said I should master the english language at a young age, it's the basics of the basics. and he was right of course, but when he said I was just teenager so didn't care much.

thanks to english i had access to all the information available on any subject, plus communication with people from everywhere, plus better job and life opportunities.

mother said i should finish highschool and that was the only thing she asked me, she said it would help me in the future to find a job. that one was wrong, but i understand her because she did it with the best intention. but i've had more than 40 jobs so far and not even once they asked me for highschool papers, and anyway i lost them many years ago

but actually mother said many many things, as i grew up with her, she was by far the most influential behavioral example i could observe while growing up, all the patterns both positive and negative, that worked and dint work for her, so i would make sure not to make the same mistakes again

or.. make them consciously, and knowing why you i made them

once i know why i make a mistake then i have 4 options:

accept it and face the consequences (I have a hang over because i drank a lot last night because I'm stupid)

disguise the fact that i made a mistake by justifying it or rationalizing it so it wont look like a mistake at all (I have a hang over because social conventions dictate that's the optimal way to socialize with your peers, either at school or at work, it's perfectly normal to drink till you drop and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that)

ignoring it (I didn't drink last night)

accepting it and learning from it (I drank too much last night as a way of coping either with some repressed emotions or with the fact I'm not so happy with my life or the circumstances around me. From now on I'll deal with my problems instead of looking for ways to temporarily escape them while harming my body at the same time)

whatever 18

what do you do for a living?

I'm a french maid

really? i don't believe you, you look like middle eastern or something

can be a french maid still

i don't think so, do you even french?

no, but i maid

do you even gee?

gee gee gee gee?

i knew someone like that

a girl i hope

yes a girl, she was lovely and i often wondered, how many people get to feel something like this? i know many people date a lot but they never get to feel this.
when i walk with her every guy envies me and when i tell them how i feel about her, they envy me even more. with her i dont need to look at any other girl because i have the best one already

you're like... so romantic...

have you ever felt like that before?

i don't think so, well maybe i did but she didn't feel the same way, so i had to just let it go and hope the feeling comes back again some day in the future

was she a nurse?

hey, how did you know?

i think you mentioned her before, when we were talking about the hospital

oh, that was a different story

about the hospital that gave you cancer i remember

yes, because there were people smoking everywhere

you mean at the entrance of the hospital?

yes and that gave me cancer

just that?

not just that.. hospital food was so bad, and didn't account for any of the daily recommended dose of anything, and instead of having treadmills or exercise machines, they had couches for people to sit, despite the hundreds of papers written and research done on the subject. they all found sitting was the worse you can do to your body, and still the hospital really wants you to take a seat. and wait sitting, and use sitting toilets even though they know it's very difficult to do No.2 in that position, and...

ok ok i get it i get it, you're a system buster, and you don't like the hospitals and you don't like anything

i liked that nurse

i know that's not true. you just like yourself

whatever

hello another way

since i left new zealand, almost 4 months ago, life for me has been a bit of a rollercoaster ride

lots of ups and downs, went back to australia and lots of things happened there in a very short time

and now back to KL and thinking about writing here again

but before i get to anything new ill have to clear out lots of drafts, almost 300, mostly from the time in taiwan

i feel sorry to have abandoned them and not having found time for them

my lost children, abandoned drafts that are probably not even relevant to my life anymore but can't just leave them behind

and they occupy some space in the attic of the mind, like a book you bought but never found the time to read, like a son you had but couldn't feed so he just hangs out around the house, indirectly shooting awkward glances at you and making you feel guilty for not feeding him

or like a japanese old playlist that no one listens to anymore because everyone likes korean music now