Ok, You know I often wonder if I play too many
videogames and they may be lowering my self awareness, because I spend more
time on the virtual world than in the real one.
That’s a good
question, and looking back at all the hours I’ve spent playing videogames when
I was your age I can honestly say I regret nothing. Gaming is about memories that will last forever and you had a smile on you while you were playing, you were having a good time and that's what counts in the long run.
Aside from the
social isolation, nothing bad came out of it, I actually treasure all the time
spent controlling Squall, Tidus, Yitan, Yuna, and Cloud, those are just a few
names I know, but you were having a great time while escaping reality, you
learned English, acquired more hand to eye coordination that you will ever know what
to do with, playing action videogames trains you to make the right decisions faster without loss of accuracy, so you are actually increasing your self awareness by developing a heightened sensitivity to what is going on around you. You will eventually grow tired of them though, so don’t worry too
much, keep playing, unless someone comes from the future and tells you otherwise..
That’s other
thing I need you to remember when you think you are making a mistake but no one
comes from the future to stop you, chances are it wasn’t even a mistake in the
first place, but a well needed step on a series of events that will lead you to
this very moment.
Is that clear? Any other questions?
Well, yes, many actually, you know there are a few cute girls at my school, but how do I know which one I really really like?
To be honest you don't. Because you don't know any of those girls well enough, you have idealized them, and are judging them by the way you feel when you are around them.
You know, we often just want something because we can't have it, or worse yet, we want something because we don't have it, and that's wrong.
Sometimes if something is too easy we loose interest, because there's no challenge, sometimes we need to feel like we've earned it, we can't just accept happiness if it's given to us, and that's also a mistake, doesn't matter how you get it, happiness is still happiness, so I want you to stay with a girl
that holds your hand and walks with you on the street, remember, being loved is
the reason you’re here now, don’t be paranoid and don’t ever think that she is
cheating on you, you’re only hurting yourself and ruining your relationships,
you need to be more confident. But back to your question, if you ever feel like you need to choose between more than one girl, i gotta tell you it really all comes down to the last person you think of at night before going to sleep.
That's good advice, got it
Next item in the agenda is that your penis
is just fine.
What? Where did that come from?
Men who worry about their penis's size, shape, etc do so because of some psychological conditions such as depression, social incompetence, awkwardness, anxiety, low self esteem, or a combination of all of them, or because they measure up to the unrealistic standard set up by the only guys the have ever seen naked, the ones in porn. I'm just gonna leave that here and swiftly move on to a less embarrassing topic
Got it: 1. Remember the monkeys. 2. There are 200 other countries. 3 Train your Nose 4. Tell family you love them. 5. Talk to yourself 6. Get stronger. 7. Do
what’s right. 8. Sign up to
couchsurfing. 9. Keep playing videogames 10. Penis is ok.
Next topic is happiness.
That's what I need, teach me master.
That's when you know it's time to move on. And you do move on, you don't invent excuses to stay in a miserable life, you move on and you do so with a smile and without looking back.
That's too deep for me right now.
Abandoning security and comfort to seek something that will make you feel alive or happier, how is that deep?
Yes, I don't get it. Why can't i just learn to be happy with what I have? How can I be happy If I always seek change and new experiences?
You got it wrong, I didn't say you have to ALWAYS seek change and new experiences, I said sometimes you will feel trapped and you will just crave them, it doesn't mean you are looking for them, it means it's what you need to do in order not to fall into a conformist materialistic, or otherwise meaningless way of life.
It's important to find a balance between stability and adventure, so I usually work one year, hang out with the same people and have a stable life and the year after that one I'd use it to travel, do something i haven't done before, hang out with different people or by myself, go to places i haven't been before and feel alive again until sooner or later, all this experiences start accumulating and being too much for our mind to process, that's when I start craving for stability again, a warm bed, a hot shower, a group of friends, a source of income, a stable relationship, etc.
So we find happiness through balance not by becoming an adventure junkie or a salary man, but by knowing what's the right thing for you to do at this specific time in your life and having the courage to act up on it instead of making up excuses like most people do, they'd say I don't have money, or I'm too young, or too old, or what will my family or friend would think? They are just really comfortable by not taking risks, doing what is expected of them and not challenging the norm, because it takes more effort.
But being comfortable doesn't mean being happy.
You are allowed to adopt this conformist attitude for a few month only, never more than a year, because there is only one life (despite what very gullible people will tell you) and it's very short so you have to make the most of it. And to make the most of it you need to learn the difference between happiness and conformity and you need to know how to wake yourself up when go into autopilot and start doing things just because they are easy, you got used to them or because other people are doing them. got it?
There is only one life? how can you be so sure? Absence of evidence is not an evidence of absence.
Well in some specially farfetched cases it is, and this is one of those cases.
How about the religions? Many of them think there is not just one life.
In that case is better not to argue with them, and that bring us to our next lesson, you see there will be times when you will lose the argument even before starting a discussion, because the reasons why you are right are too complex for your opponent to understand. People who believe in religions fall into this category, it doesn't mean you don't know how to explain it well or simply enough for them to understand, it means that they will not listen to your argument or try to understand it because they have already made up their minds a long time ago, they have been convinced that they are the ones who are right and everyone who opposes them is wrong, regardless of the argument they bring along with them.
So best thing to do in this case would be to change the subject or just walking away politely, remember the monkeys and remember they are a product of their environment and the reason they believe in this or that religions is because they have been born in this or that part of the world at this or that period in time.
But if possible I would ask you to ignore religious people altogether, always.
If someone tells you they believe in god that represents a total lack of self awareness, they will avoid any attempt at critical thinking, this are the kind of people that would defend the government and the status quo, the kind of people that would go to war and justify criminal or violent acts by saying 'it's an act of god', 'it's human nature', 'it's a complicated situation' or 'that's how the world works'.
For example if there is a child starving on the street, they will find some way to justify it so they don't need to admit that the government has failed to administer and distribute our planet's resources in a fair way. They are the enemies of change and progress, so they will be easily offended by any idea that implies that things need to change.
That's crude.
I know and it may sound arrogant, so no one should know the reasons why you ignore them, only you.
If they get pushy just smile and change the subject, or do anything in your power to avoid talking about religion.
It doesn't mean they are bad and you are good, no one is intrinsically good or bad, things change and people change, that's why in the long run you will make a few religious friends, and you will be helped by many religious people during your travels. And they will try to convert you, so just remember, be polite always, smile, and remember the monkeys.
got it: 1. Remember the monkeys. 2. There are 200 other countries. 3 Train your Nose 4. Tell family you love them. 5. Talk to yourself 6. Get stronger. 7. Do what’s right. 8. Sign up to couchsurfing. 9. Keep playing videogames 10. Penis is ok. 11. Make the most of my life. 12. Avoid religions.
Is that it?
We're almost half way there.
Ok, what's next?
That's what I need, teach me master.
95% of people don’t need to
worry about happiness, they just wake up every day, go about their habits and then
they die, like the monkeys. But once in a while, once a year or every couple of years you will meet a person and you will know that person is really happy.
I wouldn't ruin the surprise by telling you their names but when you meet them you will feel it, it doesn't meant they smile a lot or they are very friendly, there's more to happiness than that. And they will be your teachers, not me, so just stick to them and you'll do fine.
I wouldn't ruin the surprise by telling you their names but when you meet them you will feel it, it doesn't meant they smile a lot or they are very friendly, there's more to happiness than that. And they will be your teachers, not me, so just stick to them and you'll do fine.
But oftentimes you will find yourself in situations that make you wonder if you really ARE happy.
Sometimes it seems like life is good and everything is finally coming together. You have good friends, a sweet girlfriend, no financial issues, a fun job, good health and everything an average simple minded person could ask for. And there lies the problem, you are not an average person and it takes more than a little thought to figure out if you are really happy or just really comfortable.
To get the answer you need to refer back to point number 5, talk to yourself, only you know and only you can hear the screams inside you when you are trapped in a meaningless existence, craving and longing for some adventure, for something real, to experience life outside this walls you have built around you. Sometimes it seems like life is good and everything is finally coming together. You have good friends, a sweet girlfriend, no financial issues, a fun job, good health and everything an average simple minded person could ask for. And there lies the problem, you are not an average person and it takes more than a little thought to figure out if you are really happy or just really comfortable.
That's when you know it's time to move on. And you do move on, you don't invent excuses to stay in a miserable life, you move on and you do so with a smile and without looking back.
That's too deep for me right now.
Abandoning security and comfort to seek something that will make you feel alive or happier, how is that deep?
Yes, I don't get it. Why can't i just learn to be happy with what I have? How can I be happy If I always seek change and new experiences?
You got it wrong, I didn't say you have to ALWAYS seek change and new experiences, I said sometimes you will feel trapped and you will just crave them, it doesn't mean you are looking for them, it means it's what you need to do in order not to fall into a conformist materialistic, or otherwise meaningless way of life.
It's important to find a balance between stability and adventure, so I usually work one year, hang out with the same people and have a stable life and the year after that one I'd use it to travel, do something i haven't done before, hang out with different people or by myself, go to places i haven't been before and feel alive again until sooner or later, all this experiences start accumulating and being too much for our mind to process, that's when I start craving for stability again, a warm bed, a hot shower, a group of friends, a source of income, a stable relationship, etc.
So we find happiness through balance not by becoming an adventure junkie or a salary man, but by knowing what's the right thing for you to do at this specific time in your life and having the courage to act up on it instead of making up excuses like most people do, they'd say I don't have money, or I'm too young, or too old, or what will my family or friend would think? They are just really comfortable by not taking risks, doing what is expected of them and not challenging the norm, because it takes more effort.
But being comfortable doesn't mean being happy.
You are allowed to adopt this conformist attitude for a few month only, never more than a year, because there is only one life (despite what very gullible people will tell you) and it's very short so you have to make the most of it. And to make the most of it you need to learn the difference between happiness and conformity and you need to know how to wake yourself up when go into autopilot and start doing things just because they are easy, you got used to them or because other people are doing them. got it?
There is only one life? how can you be so sure? Absence of evidence is not an evidence of absence.
Well in some specially farfetched cases it is, and this is one of those cases.
How about the religions? Many of them think there is not just one life.
In that case is better not to argue with them, and that bring us to our next lesson, you see there will be times when you will lose the argument even before starting a discussion, because the reasons why you are right are too complex for your opponent to understand. People who believe in religions fall into this category, it doesn't mean you don't know how to explain it well or simply enough for them to understand, it means that they will not listen to your argument or try to understand it because they have already made up their minds a long time ago, they have been convinced that they are the ones who are right and everyone who opposes them is wrong, regardless of the argument they bring along with them.
So best thing to do in this case would be to change the subject or just walking away politely, remember the monkeys and remember they are a product of their environment and the reason they believe in this or that religions is because they have been born in this or that part of the world at this or that period in time.
But if possible I would ask you to ignore religious people altogether, always.
If someone tells you they believe in god that represents a total lack of self awareness, they will avoid any attempt at critical thinking, this are the kind of people that would defend the government and the status quo, the kind of people that would go to war and justify criminal or violent acts by saying 'it's an act of god', 'it's human nature', 'it's a complicated situation' or 'that's how the world works'.
For example if there is a child starving on the street, they will find some way to justify it so they don't need to admit that the government has failed to administer and distribute our planet's resources in a fair way. They are the enemies of change and progress, so they will be easily offended by any idea that implies that things need to change.
That's crude.
I know and it may sound arrogant, so no one should know the reasons why you ignore them, only you.
If they get pushy just smile and change the subject, or do anything in your power to avoid talking about religion.
It doesn't mean they are bad and you are good, no one is intrinsically good or bad, things change and people change, that's why in the long run you will make a few religious friends, and you will be helped by many religious people during your travels. And they will try to convert you, so just remember, be polite always, smile, and remember the monkeys.
got it: 1. Remember the monkeys. 2. There are 200 other countries. 3 Train your Nose 4. Tell family you love them. 5. Talk to yourself 6. Get stronger. 7. Do what’s right. 8. Sign up to couchsurfing. 9. Keep playing videogames 10. Penis is ok. 11. Make the most of my life. 12. Avoid religions.
Is that it?
We're almost half way there.
Ok, what's next?
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